by Miah Luz

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released February 16, 2014

written, performed, & recorded by jeremy lee harris

"bdsm song" samples peaches' "fuck the pain away"
"sound of her wings" title inspired by neil gaiman short story of the same name



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Miah Luz Vancouver, British Columbia

jeremy lee harris makes queer optimistic doom & gloom, composing from the crossroads of the mundane with the sacred & profane.

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Track Name: pan abandon
I am a dog now
there are prezygotic barriers on the lust of a bird
I am a dog now
there are post-traumatic disorders
that cause aviary-canine metamorphoses
mutations necessary to complete the change

and the fag queen eats a box of donuts for breakfast
and the carbohydrates do her psyche good
I have a zoo now in the coronary cabinet
and do kings play chess on fine grained sand?
and do boys always abandon Pan?
and do you take me for what I am?

do you take me for what I am?
and must I abandon Pan?
look out, he’s foaming at the mouth
my god, he’s foaming at the mouth
Track Name: smoke. mirrors.
and all I want is to be reconciled
a saw or two was nothing to deny
you think divinity comes easily?
what happens when there’s nothing more to give?

and all the rabbits have been exiled down
down under to a place they’ll never be found
the bevy of doves have all escaped
I’m sure you’ll continue to find a way

and vanishing tricks are good only when
you reappear somehow in the end
better bring out attendants, better bring out nudity
so that none of us catch this, so we don’t miss your trickery

as if converting to your religion
would make us all into magicians
I thought you were my reflection
but he was just a double in position (imposition)

and you inhale those mirrors
and you exhale that smoke

but the only way that he’ll get a break is to sell all of his secrets to a cheap tv network now

don’t you love how the brain invents enemies?
don’t you love how the ego makes something out of nothing
and nothing out of something?

so just extract all the really good shit
and all the animals you wish to forget
drown them down in a tank, a water trap
force feed them to a bunch of amnesiacs

work on the subway station has begun
the city streets have become overrun with
people dying to get a glimpse of your face
you’ll appear on a crane one of these days
Track Name: bdsm song
jack be nimble, jack be quick
jack jump over candlestick
sit down on it, down on it sit
the plants are making you sick

a thousand little babies
spraying from a machine gun
stealing your car for a joyride-
what will you do with them?

throw them down in the ocean

and when you eat, when you drink
and when you drink, when you eat
shit for me, little monkey
piss now real good, piss for me

look now a super soaker
filled up with holy water
issues an eternal shower:
chemical shampoo commercials

now on your knees, off your feet
now off your feet, on your knees
now eat your vegetables, eat (retrain the muscle)
now eat your vegetables, eat (retame the muscle)

until onto thy face i commit my spirit

one for doing like doggy
two for the way that you talk
three for the way that you walk
four for a father's bad luck

o come, Emmanuel,
and ransom captive israel
that mourns in lonely exile here
until the Son of God appears

Track Name: optimistic scene
one day you will wake up and know everyone's names
when you answer the phone won't be afraid
always someone to call up for coffee
one day you'll understand what all this means

i can see some movement under your skin
now i'm feeling greener than i've ever been
i can see your shirt unbuttoning
sound of metal, sound of cold water running

and i hope we somehow meet again
in carolina or on a different plane
i'll collect a thousand things to do until then
this is nothing, this is everything

one day you will wake up
Track Name: going going/ coming
you said it would be ok
you said it would be alright
so I’ve gone to the butcher today
invested in meats of every kind
temptation pushes down my throat
smoke and sugar glaze seem so sweet
hams and salamis make me strong
just don’t think about where they come from

so I’m taking it down to the ground floor
back to the back door
where you and your family won’t hear loud sounds of a queer
fighting to push his way into a hole

when I step into my car
and drive far, far to foreplay
through forests the blackness pushes madness between your thighs
and it never lies

he’s got a Benz
he has friends
he’ll assist you to the end
that guy knows how to speak
has big feet, silk sheets
a man’s got needs
and I need meat

herbivore, carnivore, omnivorous
we are poor unfortunate souls
down to the holes in our pants
holding hands tight like crying girl about to birth the world
the christ without a midwife

see jesus strung out on the cross
see me strung up with the wash
they’re the same catastrophic play
we both want to be lain in the ground
unfounded worth
to choose our own birth
and to eat meat

a girl works hard for her money
so hard, but I do it for free
I’m so hard and I do it for free
come to the yard, it’s free
a strict diet suits the life of a housewife
but a man’s gotta keep his rights
so output must exceed input
there is such a thing as being too tight

you said it would be ok
you said it would be alright
so I’ve gone to the cemetery today
invested in graves of every kind
so many people pushing down my throat and
so many people dying to get in and
I’m digging an early grave
going, going, coming faster than you can

holy fire, rain down on me
holy water, rain down on me
Track Name: pessimistic scene
so I did it again, picked up the cheap plastic
pieces of your skeleton from oncoming traffic
and the overnight Operation was a success, I guess
but your nose is still red
and maybe some mother didn't foresee how hard it would be
for you to cross the street since she'd sold your vertebrae
mello yello in the belly isn't beneficial
for birthing babies in the bible belt

now sometimes we cannot speak
won't trade being dumb
for coats in summer will not eat
a pie between the two of us
and a silent sound is breeding
in embodied breeding grounds
in a room in China, necessary mouth
when the London fog is out

and one day they'll find your notebooks
locked in a chest in a closet in Chicago
publish them hardcover with a glossy dust jacket
charge 35 bucks a pop at barnes & noble

and the press release
will say things like
"never before seen"
and everyone

will love it
Track Name: sound of her wings
I know a place you can go if it gets too hard
I know a woman or something who you can call
with the sound of her wings, with her empathetic hand
if you ask her she can make you smile again

because as the winter does away with spring, so they’ve done away with you
done you in like burnt toast, done you in like a roach
and their prayers, though fervent and frequent, are clogging up your air
how much longer must it be until you meet someone who cares?

now you’ll be able to shave your beard
now you’ll be able to drink a beer
now for breakfast you can eat a whole pie
and you’ll finally learn what orgasm feels like

if you see her
if you see Kurdt
if you see Anna Nicole
if you see Michael
if you see Judy
if you see Sylvia
if you see me
if you see all the gay kids
if you see my friend Jason
if you see her, say hey
hear the sound of her wings today

still I hope you have a good day
I hope you have a good day
but if you see her today
if you see her, it’s ok

I hope you have a good day (I hope you get your own place)
I hope you have a good day (I hope you find your own way)
but if you see her today
if you see her, say hey